Accountability

I am a little embarrassed that I have not written a post for over eight months. Unfortunately, my fitness has gone downhill, and my weight has gone up. I am hopeful if I take the time to write about it, I will be encouraged (or shamed) to get off my butt and move!

This blog was never meant to be about weight loss, but it has come down to that. And since almost no one reads this blog to begin with, I am just going to lay it all out there, in a rather boring way. But I think it will help me.

So let me begin.

The summer of 1989, when I was 17 1/2 and getting ready to head off to PSU, I gained about 8 to 10 pounds and weighed 150. That has been my weight, other than some high and low points, which I will list below, for the past 24 and a half years. To me, 150 is an okay weight for my 5' 8" body. I feel better when I am just below 150, but that is mostly because when I go to the doc, I like it when the scale notch is at 100 pounds, and the nurse has to slide the thing (to the end for sure) from there. I do not like it when I am on the 150 notch and I feel a little embarrassed when the nurse has to move the slider thing five or more pounds past the 150 notch.

My weight has gotten to about 155 probably a handful of times since the summer of '89. Following are the most notable times, not including when I was pregnant:

• Several months into my freshman year, the fall of 1989
• At different points in my sophomore and junior years; the summer between those years my parents separated, which put me at one of my heaviest (156 or so)
• Sometime around 1997 or 1998; I recall my roommate and I looking at pics of ourselves and being horrified.
• The first year I was married (1999-2000); I might have actually hit 158.
• Fall-winter of 2008-2009
• The past four months, and I am now at pretty much my heaviest, 157 pounds

I also have lost weight a number of times since 1989:

• When I first got to PSU in 1989; I did not eat that much at first.
• When I got mono in the middle of 1990 (which helped erase the weight game of late 1989)
• At the beginning of my senior year in 1992 (several months into a new relationship)
• In the winter of 1993-1994, when I broke up with my (last) college boyfriend. I was down to 142, my lowest since my senior year in high school. I was back home and I did a lot of snow shoveling!
• Sometime in 1997 to 1998, after the roommate and I realized we needed to start exercising again. Aerobics was our savior.
• A few months into my second year of marriage (gaining five to seven pounds during that first year was horrifying). I worked with a personal trainer and had pretty low body fat. I could even do 25 push-ups!
• The spring of 2009; I was around 147-149 for over four years; unemployment and swimming, running, and walking kept the weight off and me in shape.
• I also got to my lowest (again) in late 2010, when my mom was really sick. I stayed around 142-145 for only a few months. I don't recommend stress and constant worry as a diet aid.

I can say that when my weight starts to get around 152 or 153, I tend to take action. I am pretty sure once during my four years of hardly working I was around there, but put the kibosh on any further weight gain.

So what is happening to me now? Well, a big part of it is that I used to walk up and down about 600 steps going to and from my office. It took me eight minutes in the morning, and 10 minutes on the way back (because most of the almost 300 steps were up!). My thighs were pretty darn toned.

Unfortunately, since around August 21, I been taking the bus. My walk now consists of almost three minutes from my car to the bus, all flat, and about three to five minutes (depending on when I get off) from the bus stop to my office, just a slight grade. On the way home, I always get on the closer (three minutes away) stop. So 18 minutes and a huge hill has turned into about 13 minutes and mostly flat land. I do walk about 75 steps in the morning, but it is nothing like the almost 300 one way I used to. Some coworkers and I walk during lunch, but not the 20-30 minutes we used to and not every day. And I did next to nothing when I was off for over 1.5 weeks.

I could sense I was gaining weight a month into my bus riding, and I also started eating more. For many weeks I did not get on a scale. Once I did, I was past the creeping up weight. I waited another month or so, and when I weighed myself over break, there it was, staring me in the face.

I don't have a big plan. I can say I did some sit-ups on 12/30 and 1/1. I almost did two push ups on the 30th; pretty sad. Today, did a little jumping and shadow boxing for all of a couple of minutes. And I forced myself to walk up and down the steps at home a bunch of times. But several of those trips were to get food. Sigh. I did take about a 20-25-minute walk in the snow early this evening. Part of my street is hilly, so I went up that hill three times.

So far nothing I have done is great, and I have cut back on my eating only a little (compared to what I ate during the past two weeks, I have cut back).

But you have to start somewhere, and every little bit counts.

Until next time. And here is hoping next time will come soon! A special thanks to my friend Cherlee, who inspired me to get back on the horse!